Who's Your Daddy?

I need to dispel a myth that has been perpetrated ever since I can remember.  Actually it is several myths.  It involves potty training and girls.  Remember that I have two girls and that one is already potty trained.

The first myth is that girls are easier to train that boys.  I will say that my oldest girl was easy to potty train, as well as several of our boys.  They were all easy, really.  We did have one boy that had to take off ALL his cloths in order to go.  But all in all they were easy.  

Then there is my youngest girl.  I don't know what the heck is going on with her.  We have read all the books.  All the signs of readiness were there.  We started her and she did very well, for a few days.  Then total collapse.  So we waited and read some more books.  Followed the advice of the best of the best and combined it with or experience.  We started again.  She did great for a day or so.  Then nothing.  A pattern evolved, for a while, where she would do ok and then not.  Now, she just doesn't do well at all.  It is a battle at times, then other times, we sit her down and she goes right away.

We tried the "get candy" routine.  We tried the sticker chart.  After each potty she gets a sticker.  After so many stickers she would get a BIG toy.  Well, it wasn't long before she figured out where the stickers were.  She waited until we were not in the room and climbed, got them, and before long there were stickers appearing on the chart that she didn't earn.  And that's where we are right now.

The other myth, and the one that was dispelled tonight, is that girls aren't messy when they pee.  Do not get caught standing in front of your little girl when you are trying to potty train her.  Listen.  I have been married for 15 years.  I thought that I had gained a little bit of an understanding of where certain things are on a female.  On a little boy you had better make sure it is pointed down when you sit him down.  My wife had assured me that with a girl it was different.  Sure, theirs is naturally "pointed" down.  Well guys, don't believe that lie.  I got the shins of my legs sprayed tonight.  The seat was drenched.  It points down, it points down!  I  just stood there in disbelief.  What had just happened.  Oh , to be a father.

El Toro Negro

Here is the answer to the last picture.  It was a blow up of where the leg meets the body.

The Unselfish Act

So I'm sorry already.  The last week has been very rough.  My wife was on her deathbed, or at least she said so.  She ended up having strep throat.  She went to the doctor twice before getting the right medicine to clear it up.  As well, two of my kids were sick the last week and I have been sick this week end.  I think the worst has past.  

Yesterday, my wife took some of the kids to our small town PTO carnival.  They have a game where the kids can win a goldfish.  This is not my favorite game and I think they should outlaw it from the carnival.  Our kids have a long history of winning these fish and having them live forever.  This year, however, it was different.

I woke up this morning to fix breakfast, as I always do on Sunday, while my wife stayed in bed.  I am not sure how I acquired this chore, every time, especially since I get up at 3 or 4 am during the week, but I'm sure it has something to do with me doing it once.  Now it is expected, or else.  So I am walking into the kitchen, flip on the light, and there is the fish, on the floor, dried out and stiff.  It had been put in a clear glass bowl and placed on the counter.  I can't say that I was totally disappointed.  I put it back in the bowl thinking that we would have a ceremony when my daughter woke up and be done with it.  To my dismay, I looked at it a few minutes later, and the dang thing was breathing again.  Not long after that it was swimming.

I said that we have had a long history with these carnival fish and that they have normally lived for a long, long time.  We (my wife) have put them in the cabinet and forgotten about them for a few weeks, without food or light, only to find them alive and well.  We have put them on the back porch in the winter over night to find them frozen solid in the morning.  Great, right?  Well the goofy thing was ok after thawing out.  What is the deal with these things?  

I guess that statistically speaking there would be one that would die easily out of the ones we have gotten over the years.  This was that year.  After coming home from church we found the fish floating, dead.  Really dead.  Now he resides in the back pasture, ready to complete the circle of life by being eaten by some raccoon or other critter.  What an unselfish sacrifice.   The ultimate act of giving.  Thank you little fish.

El Toro Negro

Now for another quiz.  What is it?  (It's not grandpaw Frank's ear.)

Not in My Sync

We have been married for about 15 years.  One of the things that I love about my wife is her hair.  It is long and thick and not yet gray.  One of the things I don't like is that she sheds... like crazy.  

In our last house we had one bathroom.  Only one.  For eight of us.  I knew that their was a hair problem because fairly often I would have to clean the drain.  Not a fun thing to do.  It is really slimy with all the soap.  My question is how in the world does it get in the sink?  Shouldn't it come out in the tub or shower?  I don't recall seeing her stand over the sink and shake her head.  But with three girls,well, I should have expected it, right?  

I thought in our new house I wouldn't have to deal with this issue quite so often.  In our bathroom we have a his and her sink.  She has this sitting area where she can do her makeup and hair.  What I never expected was to find these really long hairs in MY sink.  I really am beginning to think that she is sneaking in when I am not around and placing her hair in my sink for me to find.   

We have been in this house about six months and I have already had to clean out her sink.  I don't know what to do to fix this problem.  My wife claims that there is no fix.  It just happens.  Well, love knows no bounds.

El Toro Negro

I am adding this just to see if y'all can guess what this is.  It is driving my wife crazy.

Say What?

I went through some of the photos that we took of the A&M game we went to a few weeks ago.  I found something very interesting.  

At first glance there isn't anything wrong.  But check out the ref.  What the heck is he doing?  Is he in pain?

Maybe he has a bet with his ref buddies that he can make a lewd gesture during the game and get away with it.  It is possible that he has a lewd gesture during a collegiate sporting event fetish and couldn't help himself.  It's a disease.  I tend to think he is heckling the line judge on the side.

I just happened to catch this.  Think how many times this goes on and no one knows about it.  A epidemic.  WOW.

El Toro Negro

Our Pet

You already know that we have an embroidery business.  With that comes some shirts that we, usually me, mess up.  With me it is usually the wrong color.  Normally, we will keep these to use when we need to sample a new design.  We will sew it on the tail of the messed up shirt.  These shirts are kept in a big tub under our sewing table and from time one of our kids will ask for a shirt for some "project" that they have going on.  

My wife's father has, or had, quite a few mounted animals.  He gave my second son a stuffed squirrel that is most likely twenty plus years old.  He loves that squirrel.  Not my father in law, my son. 

Not long after he acquired the animal he came to my wife and asked if he could have a shirt out of the tub, and also asked if he could cut it up.  It was a shirt that had an A&M logo on it.  We really didn't need it so she told him ok.  It wasn't long after that that he came and asked for a needle and thread.  We weren't sure what he wanted and with Jake there was no telling.  She gave him the tools.

What we soon found out was that he was making a shirt for his little friend.  This son is one of the ones that can sit and work on a project building something for hours and never look up.  He loves to build and take apart.  He is a funny dude.  I never thought we would have a pet like this one.

El Toro Negro

Round n Round

I wanted to try this out, putting a video on my blog.  Plus, I think my boy is cute.  He makes me laugh.

El Toro Negro

Barack and His All A's Program

My oldest son will soon be 14.  For about the last year he has been on us about buying him a cell phone.  I know that some of you will think that that qualifies as abuse, but it has been our rule so far.  Hey, I know of a seven year old that has her own personal cell phone.  

So we made a deal.  Our kids have always been required to make at least an 80, in each class they take, to avoid punishment.  That's where the bar is set from the time they enter school.  The deal was brokered.  If he made all A's for the school year we would buy a cell phone for him.  If even one B was on his report card the deal was off.  He, to my great surprise and pleasure, has taken this deal and ran with it.  He has worked very hard and has earned great marks in all his classes.  It has already taught him other things.  How to study and be prepared, and how to keep up with where he is grade wise, so he doesn't get in a position where he doesn't have enough time to bring a grade up before the grades come out.  He is talking with his teachers about his performance and how he can improve.  All things that will help him in the future.  Now he is even wanting to be the valedictorian of the 8th grade.  Of coarse I didn't even know there was such a thing.  Then there is the idea that someone needs to "graduate" from kindergarten.  What the heck have they accomplished.  The skill of finger painting.    

The thing that causes me to write is a lame idea the school is tossing around.  It seems that there are kids, more likely parents, that feel bad when their friends or classmates earn higher scores than them.  Apparently it hurts their feelings.  SO the school is proposing to take the all A student's grades, the kids that have any A's, and give them all C's.   They then want to give the kids that have D's and failing grades all C's.  Sort of average them all out.  No one needs to feel bad.  Everyone is the same.  I am so mad I can spit nails.  What the heck are the administrator thinking.  Those kids, A's and F's alike, EARNED those grades.  Why should the ones who have worked hardest have to take less while those that have worked the least or not at all be given more.  Grab the torches and pitchfork, right?  Remind you of those games (usually soccer) where they don't keep score?

Well, they aren't really wanting to do that, at least not yet.  What I want to illustrate is a point that Hank Williams Jr. made about barack obama and his comments to Joe the Plumber.  It makes about as much sense to take the wealth of someone that has worked hard and earned it, and give it to the welfare brood, as it does to take a kids A's and give it to the kids who didn't want to achieve, and earn F's.

One thing that I hate a great deal, is the idea put forth by some, that someone can't "make it"  in this country without the help of the Government.  This country is not great because of it's Government.  It is not the greatest country ever because of diversity.  It is the greatest country that has ever existed because of liberty and opportunity.  In is conception, the Government was to stay out of the publics life except in very specific instances.  The Government was to ensure the availability of opportunity, not this idea that everyone should have the same amount of wealth.  It was to provide fairness through the opportunity of success and the possibility of failure.  

The limit being discussed, right now, is $250k.  At that point you are rich and will have what is rightfully yours taken from you and given to someone else.  Someone who more than likely is POOR.  You know the ones.  Those that get food stamps (here in Texas it is called the Lone Star card) but have manicured nails, and satellite TV.  Those that pay no income taxes at all yet get a refundable tax credit (meaning that they paid no income tax at all but are somehow getting a refund of their tax money) but have a cell phone, high speed internet, spinner rims, an LCD flat screen 52" HDTV, and are 5'8" and weigh 350lbs.  

Sure it sounds great to those that don't produce.  "You mean that they are going to give me more money?  Sure I'll vote for you."  What happens when the Government programs somehow cost more that "projected"?  That ALWAYS happens.  Well, the threshold for "rich" suddenly drops to $100k.  Crap, a husband and wife raising a couple of kids who both make $50k are suddenly rich.  With day care, house payment, a couple of car payments, food and electricity, etc., it ($) goes fast.  

El Toro Negro